thebatteur:

once in kindergarten a girl asked me to write “super girl” on her arm since i was the only kid who could write so i wrote “shit” on her arm and i hid under the table for like 30 minutes then the teacher found me and yelled at me then called my parents and my dad laughed so hard he cried

westbor0baptistchurch:

Started from the bottom

Now we’re here.

internetexplorers:

errorsanitynotfound:

internetexplorers:

why hasn’t anyone offered my parents 5 camels for my hand in marriage yet what am i doing wrong

its because you are worth at least 10 camels and they just cant afford you

this is the nicest thing anyone’s ever said to me